Category Archives: British

2009, Barely Acceptable Trash, British, Could Be Hard To Watch, Creepy, Disturbing Image, Gangs, Horror, Not Recommended, Occasional gore, Sex Scenes, Suspense, Unusual

Heartless (2009)

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From NetFlix:

Reclusive Londoner Jamie Morgan, who bears a prominent, heart-shaped birthmark on his face yet can’t seem to find love anywhere, makes a deal with a devil-like figure to get a girl — but there’s a deadly price to pay

Never did I ever think I would watch a horror film. However, in a moment of weakness (while doing something else mundane) I allowed myself to stream from Netflix this heartless horror flick. My first inclination was to stop almost immediately until I saw that the famous British actress Ruth Sheen was Jamie’s mother. Also the part of the devil (?) was played by Joseph Mawle (Benjen Stark in “Game of Thrones“. Well, if those known actors can lower themselves to play in a horror flick, who am I to not watch and cringe along?

“Cringe” is possibly a fair choice of words because there is at least one nasty scene (i.e. ripping out someone’s heart – does that count as nasty?) for which you might brace yourself.

Oddly enough this sell-your-soul (better than working for Goldman Sachs?) plot features some good acting. Jim Sturgess (Adam in “Upside Down”) presents a very well played Jamie Morgan.

However, in the final analysis, there is a lot of silliness and gore. If you don’t have a lot of spare time on your hands (or don’t have a bank book to balance) be sure to skip this barely acceptable piece of trash.

Is this a guilty pleasure or what?

2012, Action Film, British, Car Chase, Chase film, Frenetic, Good digital effects, Mayhem, Revenge, Sex Scenes, Spy Theme, Suspense, Violent, Witty dialog

Skyfall (2012)

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From Netflix:

When a serious menace threatens MI6, James Bond is on the case — putting aside his own life and personal issues to hunt and obliterate the perpetrators. Meanwhile, secrets arise from M’s past that strain Bond’s loyalty to his longtime boss.

From Netflix you can stream this 2 hour 23 minute action film.

If nothing else, don’t miss the opening chase scene, possibly the current champion in the race to create ever more frantic and probably impossible chases. Comparing this James Bond film with past efforts shows how far film-makers have progressed in their craft. Just how do you make a London subway train crash through its track floor?

Something new has been added: Both M and James are supposedly getting older which pretends to be the main theme in the film. Of course, James appears in some sex scenes. Perhaps it is just his face, which was made to look if not old then at least really haggard (whereas his body is in very good shape, something that make-up probably cannot hide). Indeed he can stay underwater for 15 minutes and tends to leap over tall buildings (reality is just not important). During the filming he was a young 44 years of age.

As M, Judy Dench fits the bill very well. And she at times in the film looks really old! But let’s give her a break because during the filming she was a young 78 years of age.

Creepy surprise: Javier Bardem knows how to make a really hammy villain. Should we ask how he managed to get a mouthful of decayed teeth? He is the kid on the block because during filming he was a mere 43 years old.

Never mind what the critics say, if you are a James Bond fan then this is just another in a long line of eye-candy adventures.

1994, British, Crime, Detective, Drugs, Psychological Drama, Satirical ultra-violence, Suspense, Unusual, Violent

Shallow Grave (1994)

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From Netflix:

Ewan McGregor stars in this grimly comic tale of three roommates who find their enigmatic new flatmate dead in his room with a stash of drugs and a suitcase full of cash. What will they do with all that money — and the corpse?

Basically the plot is that the suitcase full of cash little by little corrupts each of the three friends. Suspense builds as their increasingly paranoid behavior leads to conflicts and more. Be prepared for violence along with the good acting. Ewan McGregor almost never appears in an unworthy film. But this film is also a bit strange.

And who will win the cash competition ?

2011, Acceptable for children, British, Conspiracy, Fantasy, Flirting, Made For TV, Mediocre, Sci-Fi, Supernatural, TV Series, Violent

The Outcasts (2011)

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From NetFlix:

Set in 2040, this BBC sci-fi drama focuses on the residents of the frontier town of Forthaven on the planet Carpathia — a region colonized by a hardy group of settlers who rocketed away from Earth in the wake of war and nuclear devastation.

Because one of the actors in this British Sci-fi TV series is Hermione Norris (who plays Stella Isen) I started to watch “The Outcasts”. Ms. Norris was one of the main actors in the British TV series MI-5.

Although this series is nothing special, the plot twisted enough to keep me watching. Some characters were interesting, for example

  • Hermione Norris offers a stiking appearance. She can also act.
  • Eric Mabius as Julius Berger plays a wonderfully insidious villain arrived from Earth and plots to take over Forthaven. He plays Peter Caldwell in the successful American TV series “Scandal”.
  • Liam Cunningham played Ser Davos Seaworth in “Game of Thrones”> In “Outcasts” he is the current president of Forthaven and the target of Julius Berger’s schemes.

If cloned humans, escape from a failed planet Earth, a mysterious new planet Carpathia, political maneuvering, love affairs (open or secret), and huge dust storms interest you, then give this 8-episode series a try.

Acceptable for children, British, Classical musicians, Feel Good For All, Love Story, Melodrama, Senior citizens

Quartet (2012)

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From NetFlix:

A trio of retired opera singers’ annual celebration of Verdi’s birthday sours when their estranged fourth member shows up but refuses to sing. Tensions rise and diva drama erupts — will personal problems prevent the show from going on?

Do not confuse this British film with the American film A Late Quartet.

Maggie Smith (“Downton Abbey”), Tom Courtenay (“The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner”), Billy Connolly (Thomas Bell in “House M.D.”), and Pauline Collins (“Shirley Valentine”) form the quartet of retired opera singers. Michael Gambon (Professor Albus Dumbledore in “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2”) is a self-appointed impresario.

They and a large group of retired musicians reside in a beautiful palace-like home for retired musicians set in glorious British countryside. In fact, the other aged actors are real-life retired musicians. Stay for the final credits in which you see for many of these characters a double set of photos: one photo from the present paired with a photo of them in their performing prime.

If nothing else, the scenery is gorgeous and well worth seeing the film on a large screen as we did in a movie house. Additionally the music is wonderful. Although the story is a bit melodramatic, it is still worth the watch.

Enjoy!

1994, British, Catholic culture, Child Molestation, Drama, Explicit sex, Gay theme, Religious Theme

Priest (1994)

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From NetFlix:

Director Antonia Bird’s film centers on Father Greg Pilkington (Linus Roache), a devout Catholic priest who struggles with a love for his church and congregation — and his secret life as a homosexual with a gay lover (Robert Carlyle). After hearing the confession of a young girl in his parish, who tells him her father is sexually abusing her, the priest is torn between the laws of the church and his need to choose one life over the other.

When this film appeared in 1994 the reviews were a mixture of praise and condemnation. Here the thesis is that the Catholic church is out-of-date and needs to change. No matter your opinion in this case, from an artistic standpoint many viewers, myself included, found the film often preachy, overly melodramatic, and driven by a prejudiced agenda. Still, the film held my attention throughout.

Three separate issues run through the film: Father Matthew Thomas (Tom Wilkinson) is living with the housekeeper, Father Greg Pilkington (Linus Roache) is gay, and a parishoner is sexually abusing his young daughter. With this last item the problem is that due to the “seal of confession” Father Greg feels he cannot tell anyone.

Some sex scenes between Father Greg and his male lover Graham (Robert Carlyle) are explicit.

In watching an old film it can be fun seeing actors that you know from films and TV closer to the present:

  • Linus Roache played Michael Cutter in both “Law and Order” and “Law and Order SVU”.
  • Tom Wilkinson has a huge acting resume. You may recall him as Graham Dashwood in “The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel”
  • Robert Carlyle also has a long resume. You may remember his as Gaz in the 1997 film “The Full Monty”.

My strongest reaction to this film was: “Here we are 19 years after the film was made and there have been no changes in the Catholic church”. Surprise!

2004, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, Acceptable for children, Acceptable Science, Asperger's Syndrome, British, Could Be Sad, DO NOT MISS, Dog Story, Drama, Dysfunctional Lives, Feel Good For All, Love Story, Made For TV, School Teacher, Small British village, Small Town

Doc Martin (2004)

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From NetFlix:

Crippled by a sudden and inconvenient fear of blood, flashy surgeon Dr. Martin Ellingham abandons his bustling London practice and sets up shop as a country doctor in this medically minded British sitcom.

Are you looking for a warm, friendly, non-violent, comic, personal British sitcom? Look no further. Beginning in 2004 and extending over 5 years of wonderful episodes, you can relax and enjoy “Doc Martin”.

Doc Martin (played by Martin Clunes) is a very unusual character. For starters he is a family doctor who is sickened by the sight of blood (he looks away when he draws a blood sample). Most importantly he is completely hopeless in any social situation. My guess is that he is supposed to suffer from Asperger’s syndrome. Nowadays we would say that he “doesn’t have a clue”.

He has set up practice in a charming, small, British village on the sea. He is a brilliant diagnostician and much of each episode has him helping people in his impossibly brusque manner. In fact, part of the comedy in the series is his reaction (or non-reaction) to everyone, including his patients.

Do not misunderstand: the stories are not pablum. Some of the situations are harrowing. For example, we see his icy mother just once when she visits and explains that she never loved him because he “got in the way”. Along the way we see villagers afflicted with OCD, vertigo, psychosis, etc. Nonetheless the “cringe” factor is very low compared to today’s British TV plots.

All 5 seasons are available on DVD. NetFlix offers DVD or streaming for all the episodes.

In the area of family sitcoms I would rate this series a DO NOT MISS!

2011, Acceptable for children, British, Comedy, Crude Talk, DO NOT MISS, Feel Good For All, Fishing, Love Story, Optimistic, Politicians

Salmon Fishing in the Yemen (2011)

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From NBetFlix:

A sheik with a love for the sport hopes to introduce fly-fishing to the Middle East and turns to uptight fisheries expert Fred Jones for help. Buoyed by the sheik’s enthusiasm (and his comely English aide), Fred sets out to achieve the impossible.

Ewan McGregor does it again. Somewhat of a rarity these days, this film is a feel-good that the entire family can watch. Good plot, good acting, good romance, good humor: what’s not to like?

Kristin Scott Thomas is perfect as a hard-nosed, ambitious, ruthless, and vulgar governmental communications maven.

Emily Blunt portrays Harriet well as a young woman caught between two loves.

Ewan McGregor carries off the role of a fishing geek (possibly with Asperger’s, but that is not completely clear) who agrees to try the impossible and bring salmon fishing to a desert.

Even though there is no sex and violence, DO NOT MISS!

1985, Acceptable Trash, B-movie, British, Mayhem, Not Recommended, Nudity, Sci-Fi, Sex Scenes, Vampire, Zombies

Lifeforce (1985)

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From NetFlix:

American and British astronauts on a joint mission exploring an alien spacecraft discover that the vessel contains several seemingly human bodies. But after they’re brought back to Earth, they come alive and start turning Londoners into zombies.

Here is a true example of a film that is so bad that it is “good”. This bomb will certainly become, if it is not already, a cult film. Blame my son Mike for suggesting the film to me.

And who would risk their careers appearing in such a B-film ? Patrick Stewart was 45 when he made this stinker. Two years later he started as Captain Picard in the Star Trek series and the rest is history. Peter Firth was a slender 32 year old during the filming. He started to play Harry Pearce in the MI-5 British TV series in 2002.

With its tongue firmly in cheek, this adventure offers us among other rewards: well-endowed Matilda May appears totally naked for most of the film; you get to see humans get their life force sucked out by space vampires after which the human bodies are desiccated; Patrick Stewart lies on a slab in his best suit and speaks with a woman’s voice because he has been inhabited by Matilda May. Fortunately Patrick Steward does not appear naked.

To be fair, sometimes the dialog or events are so stupid or far-fetched that you might actually laugh out loud.

By now you should have appreciated that only if you have the time to waste should you consider watching this screen gem.

2011, Based on true facts, British, Comedy, Drama, Explicit sexual discussion, Feel Good Not For Children, Love Story, Satire

Hysteria (2011)

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From NetFlix:

In 1880s London, forward-thinking young doctor Mortimer Granville has a difficult time keeping a job until he and an inventor friend concoct an electrifying solution to the rampant “hysteria” affecting England’s sexually and socially repressed women.

Along with the fun and naughty treatment of the invention of the sexual vibrator, there is an underlying theme of women’s rights in Victorian England as well as a budding romance between the young Doctor Granville and the rebellious socialist daughter of Granville’s greedy employer.

Maggie Gyllenhaal (who played the title role in “Secretary”) plays the rebellious daughter. At first I did not recognize Rupert Everett as Edmund St. John-Smythe (probably because he was sporting a beard and has put on a bit of weight) who plays the inventor of the vibrator.

Despite my own enthusiasm, my daughter Kate found the film to be a bit “smaltzy”. Although not for children, at least it offers 100 minutes of somewhat thought-provoking amusement for the older family members.